My Pet Hates and Dislikes!

• abuse
• "actually" there are many words and phrases in use that contradict and confuse.
• aftershave
• air conditioning
• airport departure lounges
• "and I was like"
• the anthropic principle
• AOL CD-ROMs
• "as it were"
• avocados
• badly-planned and badly-executed projects
• "basically"
• The Bee-Gees
• beige, cream, magnolia, grey
• being late
• bestiality
• betting and gambling
• bigotry
• billboards
• "bitch slap"
• BMW cars
• body odour
• breaking fingernails
• bullies
• burgers
• Capital FM
• CCTV
• censorship
• Christmas goods in the shops in September (BHS, Oxford Street, 3 Sept 2000)
• cigarette smoke
• Coca Cola
• coathangers
• compilation albums
• computer viruses
• Conservatives
• copies and rip-offs
• cost codes
• country & western music
• cowards
• The Criminal Justice Act
• custard
• customer loyalty cards
• cyclists on pavements
• dates in US format
• dedicated followers of fashion
• depression
• digital TV
• Celine Dion
• dirty toilets
• divisiveness
• dumbing down
• "dumbing down"
• e-companies whose names end in ent or ant
• 80s rock and pop
• Eurovision Song Contest
• excrement
• fatty meat
• feng shui
• fluorescent lighting
• forms! (i) not enough choices; (ii) badly designed; (iii) incomprehensible
• Friends
• genetic modification
• GMTV
• governments or groups that want to control the internet
• greasy fingerprints
• gridlockers It doesn't take much lateral thinking to remember reverse gear.
• guns
• "guys" I hate that - it's so levelling.
• halitosis
• headaches
• "I hear what you're saying"
• Herman Miller Aeron chairs
• Hollywood movies (since 1979)
• homelessness
• hot air hand-driers
• influenza
• insurance company commercials
• "ironic" really - would that be Socratic irony? Usually things are unfortunate or coincidental, NOT ironic. And irony is also quantum because saying something is rather ironic is like saying something is almost unique.
• James Bond films
• JC Decaux - make those horrid pavement-mounted posters aka mushrooms. The ugliest street furniture yet.
• jewel-encrusted Kleenex boxes (esp. in cars on the rear parcel shelf)
• junk mail (and spam)
• keyboards with no forward delete
• "kids"
• "kinda"
• "know what I mean?"
• lies
• The Lighthouse Family
• "like" is used like "kinda" by those scared of making definite statements. Worse, it is used like this: "and I was like, whoa!"
• long queues in Sainsburys supermarket - why do they keep the queues so long?
• longer queues in Halifax building society
• margarine
• MAX/E - I promise, you do not want to know what this is.
• mellow music
• Melody FM
• mobile phones
• model railways
• music in bookshops
• muzak
• New Labour
• new shoes
• Nike
• nuclear power
• "orientated"
• organized religion
• pagers
• painting ceilings
• patenting nature as opposed to inventions
• peanut butter
• people who claim urban legends are true (because it happened to a friend of a friend)
• people who slam hotel doors at 7am
• people who open time capsules
• people who see things in binary terms
• people who sneeze over others
• people who talk loudly in restaurants
• people who use a word without knowing its meaning
• people who won't accept apologies
• people with no sense of humour
• period-style radios with modern electronics inside
• Phil Collins
• phlegm
• plastic cups
• pod people
• Pokemon
• pollution
• pot noodles
• powdered milk
• PR, spin doctors and focus groups
• "Pre-warned"
• Pringles
• prions
• procrastination
• public telephones that don't take coins
• queuing
• racism
• The Rat and Parrot and other stupid pub names
• reading on the London Underground - impossible to do because of the pre-recorded announcements every minute or so.
• The RIP Bill
• Rover cars
• Scientologists
• security cameras
• sexism
• "sleek"
• smug posters for Jack Daniels
• sniffing
• snobbery
• spiders
• sport
• Star Trek
• Star Wars
• stereotyping
• subways
• Sunny Delight
• tabloid newspaper
• tautology
• telephone callers who promise to ring back but don't
• telephone callers who put me on hold
• telephone callers who put the phone down without saying anything
• theme pubs
• ticket touts
• tobacco companies
• tomato skins
• traffic jams
• trains that leave early ( - except when I'm on them)
• Shania Twain
• TV Licence reminders every six months (no TV here for years...)
• TV stations that routinely talk over end-credits and/or reduce them in size so I can't read them.
• underscores (what's_wrong_with_hyphens? - or a space?)
• Luther Vandross (the aptly-named)
• vigilantes
• Virgin FM has such a small playlist you can hear their entire collection in two days.
• vocoders
• vomit
• waiting for British Telecom to install ADSL
• waiting for buses
• waiting rooms
• "way"
• West Life (and all boy bands, in fact any vocal groups who do that stupid dancing in the video and include a key change in the alleged song)
• "whatever"
• white bread
• wigs
• Robbie Williams
• Windows 3.1, 95, 98, etc.
• windscreen washers (teams of rude people at traffic lights)
• witch-hunts
• The X-Files
• yachts

If you have views on any of these, I will happily append any comments to this page. Don't take it too seriously!

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